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Forum - Dealing with fear of success
Dealing with fear of success
Tue, 18/08/2009 - 11:19 — Ian Currie
People often talk to me about the 'fear of success' as being a significant block to starting or carrying through on initial ideas. Sometimes it is hard to recognise this kind of fear because it is rarely discussed amongst peers. Once it is acknowledged then it becomes easier to recognise and deal with both personally and in the collective situation. If you find you have resistance to putting your head above the parapet, committing to ideas or following through on them this could be the reason. There are different components to the fear of success which inhibits initiative. A couple are , it means more work, you could incur the jealousy of peers or bosses, and you need to take more responsibility than you are used to. Any thoughts about this?
There is more discussion of this at the Creative Exchange on www.creative-engagement.co.uk
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Aha this was covered in todays 'Daily OM'
Honoring Life Changes
The Wisdom of Fear
Anything worth doing will always have some fear attached to it. For example, having a baby, getting married, changing careers—all of these life changes can bring up deep fears. It helps to remember that this type of fear is good. It is your way of questioning whether you really want the new life these changes will bring. It is also a potent reminder that releasing and grieving the past is a necessary part of moving into the new.
Fear has a way of throwing us off balance, making us feel uncertain and insecure, but it is not meant to discourage us. Its purpose is to notify us that we are at the edge of our comfort zone, poised in between the old life and a new one. Whenever we face our fear, we overcome an inner obstacle and move into new and life-enhancing territory, both inside and out. The more we learn to respect and even welcome fear, the more we will be able to hear its wisdom, wisdom that will let us know that the time has come to move forward, or not. While comfort with fear is a contradiction in terms, we can learn to honor our fear, recognizing its arrival, listening to its intelligence, and respecting it as a harbinger of transformation. Indeed, it informs us that the change we are contemplating is significant, enabling us to approach it with the proper reverence.
You might wish to converse with your fear, plumbing its depths for a greater understanding of the change you are making. You could do this by sitting quietly in meditation and listening or by journaling. Writing down whatever comes up—your worries, your sadness, your excitement, your hopes—is a great way to learn about yourself through the vehicle of fear and to remember that fear almost always comes alongside anything worth doing in your life.
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Book recommendation: Who Moved My Cheese by Dr Spencer Johnson.
Hi Ian,
Very interesting post. I would have thought fear of failure is significantly more common among people who are considering starting a business on the back of an idea they have. Circumstances (eg family commitments, lack of money or even access to information, etc) might also prevent many people from taking the plunge, no matter how good their idea for a business. Some people are simply not comfortable with the inevitable risk that goes with running your own business.
I don't think increased workload, petty jealousy and added responsibility would be enough to put off your average owner-manager, if they were confident they had an idea that could take their business onto the next level. Solution is evolution, and new ideas fuel survival and growth. Fear of failure might again create reluctance, while lack of resource is often a factor, too. Frequently, that can simply mean an owner-manager not having enough time to devote to new ideas.
I'd imagine the 'components to the fear of success' you mention are more common to employees who work within large organisations, where quite frequently other people can also get the credit and reward for other people's initiative, creativity and hard work, so why bother putting forward any ideas?
Thought-provoking stuff. I'll be sure to have a look at the site...
Agreed, thought provoking stuff.
You touch briefly on the idea that family can impact on a persons fears. What about when family actively hinder a person because they are ashamed to admit their son or daughter has become self employed? I have seen this in small business where parents sabotage their children for a variety of reasons - fear of their success, fear of their failure (sometimes fear of what the neighbours will say!).
I will go and look at the full article.
Sarah
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